My Planned Life

Birthdays are the best. I love celebrating, reflecting and counting the years. In my case, the counting needs to start slowing down. At 44 today, I proudly can still claim to be in my early 40’s, yet I’ve only got one more year to enjoy that status.

Today I’m reminded of my own “coming into the world” story, some real miracles that occurred in that process and some profound impressions I take from it.

Isaiah 49:1 "......the Lord called me before my birth; from within the womb he called me by name."

I’ve given birth to 3 babies. Three boys. My body stretched, squished, torn, cramped, pushed, fattened and scarred from their thriving. Every birthday, lest we forget, a momma cries in anguish - yet filled with the joy set before her at the coming of her baby. This juxtaposition so magnificent.

My dad was in the US Air Force, and our family was stationed at Yakota AFB in Japan from 1975-1978.  Shortly after moving abroad, my mom found out she was pregnant with ME.

 They were adapting to life in a foreign country, visiting interesting destinations, trying all sorts of cuisine, and meeting friends from all over the world.  

June 2, 1976, it was time for me to be born.  During labor, the fetal heart monitor showed that with each contraction my heart rate was dropping.  After some analysis, the doctors determined that the umbilical cord was wrapped tightly around my neck, choking me.

My family jokingly likes to point out that this lack of blood flow to the brain must be the origin of all my quirks, unless it was the fall from the top of the slide onto a concrete slab, headfirst, at the age of 2....maybe it's both?

They made an immediate decision to go into an emergency c-section...and even in 1976, they had me out quickly.  Sure enough, the cord was wrapped around my neck twice and under one arm...evidence that I, a little bundle of energy,  was soon to be trouble for my young 24 year old parents.. (i.e. summersaults in mom's belly).

The umbilical cord was severed and carefully fixed into my belly button, the cutest ‘scar’ on each of our bodies.

We all bear the scar of the life source that brought us maturation as preborns.

They monitored me, and soon I was in my mothers arms breathing, nursing and thriving.

As I process this story again, God reminds me that He knew me and named me before I was born.  He watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. His eyes saw me then. What was perhaps an attempt of the enemy to 'steal, kill and destroy' - was providentially interrupted through the prayers of my parents and the wisdom and strength of skilled doctors...and my mother, she bears the scars as evidence of my planned life.  

I weep with gratitude and heartache for mothers who bear …ALL KINDS OF SCARS

The Lord has poured out His immeasurable mercy on me through the course of this life.  I have experienced profound times where a deep sense of plan and purpose was known, lived out and acknowledged..and other times when life feels like an endless walk through dark woods. Nothing scripted or robotic about either season. Free will has been given to me - to choose Him.

or not

Even still…this juxtaposition so magnificent, for the joy set before Him, He endured the cross so that my life could possibly intersect with HIS.

Every life is a revelation.

Today I will celebrate with my family and perhaps a couple of friends. I will blow out some candles as they celebrate my being born on this day. Yet, each of us are destined for an even greater reality than this physical birth. Eternity crying for a day when we are born again. This inherent value over our lives. Will we respond and open our hearts to the ONE who bears every scar for all people - as evidence of our planned lives.

Oh and when we find this new life, this life source, it’s immeasurably, even better than this earthy birthday celebration with our families and friends ... we get to party with all of Heaven.

“Behold, I have inscribed you on the palms of my hands” Isaiah 49:16